2 February 2005

for security reasons

For security reasons, you must download and install this piece of software into your back-office application. No, you don't get the source code. No, you don't get to see the protocol it uses with the host. No, we won't document what information it is sending. It works, trust us. No, we don't give you a warranty that it works.

posted 11:45 | link

30 January 2005

for security reasons

For security reasons, continue on your way past the incident. The officers know what they are doing.

posted 13:49 | link

29 January 2005

for security reasons

For security reasons, do not form lasting emotional attachments.

posted 14:39 | link

31 May 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, take off your shoes.

Just. Take. Them. Off.

posted 21:36 | link

26 May 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, do not bring a camera here. That’s not a camera, is it?

posted 12:57 | link

8 May 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, do not inquire too closely as to what “law enforcement activity” means.

posted 00:08 | link

1 May 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, expect to pay more in the future.

posted 18:17 | link

30 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, we are now enforcing that rule.

posted 09:37 | link

29 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, you will need to walk from here.

posted 10:01 | link

28 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, do not stare at the government building for an extended period.

posted 09:29 | link

27 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, that, and anything like it, should only be done in the privacy of your home.

posted 10:08 | link

26 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, do not adjust the thermostat.

posted 10:29 | link

25 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, those schedules are out of date. All the trains are gone for the day.

posted 09:21 | link

24 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, use the back entrance to your work location for the next week.

posted 10:17 | link

23 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, all of the restrooms are closed. Yes, all.

posted 07:57 | link

22 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, we no longer feel that “To Protect and To Serve” is an appropriate motto.

posted 08:23 | link

21 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, do not wear cold-weather clothing to the airport, even if the weather at your destination is, in fact, cold.

posted 07:31 | link

20 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, we will be unable to deal with the flooding promptly.

posted 08:20 | comments (0) | link

19 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, we interrupt this program.

posted 08:46 | link

18 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, be sure your blinds are drawn.

posted 09:39 | link

17 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, that yellow sign means something very different from what it used to.

posted 07:48 | link

16 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, this will be added to your permanent record.

posted 07:51 | link

15 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, none of the questions on the form are optional.

posted 08:45 | link

14 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, hang up, and try your call again later.

posted 07:34 | link

13 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, the right lane is closed indefinitely. Expect delays.

posted 08:15 | link

12 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, empty all objects from your pockets. Yes, all.

posted 09:13 | link

11 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, wait behind the yellow line. Farther back. That's good.

posted 10:38 | link

10 April 2004

for security reasons

For security reasons, do not use the name of a loved one as a password.

posted 08:36 | link