christophe thinks out loud

The headline alone makes it

From the BBC: “Underwater gnome threat 'returns'”

Ikea Kills

I told you that Ikea was dangerous.

Life Imitates Satire, part 2313

A photograph of what Islamic militants claim is a captive US soldier may have been posed with a toy figure, an army doll manufacturer has said.

Bubble Wrap Appreciation Day

It's all over the web. Web Zen is doing it. Boing Boing is doing it.

Of course, speaking as a shipping supplies nerd, I was into bubble wrap way before it was cool.

From the Encyclopaedia of Vaguely Creepy Things

Two adults, in a four seat car, one driving, one in the back seat, where the one driving is not a professional.

Things I've Been Keeping to Myself

To start the new year, a collection of links that I don't think I've blogged about before . . .

• The Doubtful Palace — Lovely music. Just when I think I've found something unconnected to the rest of my life, I discover that the Doubtful Palace band Conjure Wife (full marks for the name) recorded at least one piece with Leigh Ann Hussey, who must be the same Leigh Ann Hussey of Brazen Hussey, who often plays at PEERS events, PEERS being run by good friends of mine. Could everyone step back, just a bit?
• Warrenellis.com — Often cranky, always insightful. From the author of (among many other things) Transmetropolitan.
• A Lesson is Learned But the Damage is Irreversible — A simply beautiful web comic. Don't take their update schedule personally.

Letterboxing

Anything I could say would ruin it.

Creepy Phone Calls

Ever since we moved to our new place in Alameda, we’ve been getting more telemarketing calls. No big surprise; world+dog can find out that we’re new home owners from public records. What surprises me is that some of them are rather, ah, specific. In particular, many of them ask to speak “to the lady of the house,” and apparently I won’t do.

Today’s was even stranger. Ring, ring, click, hello, “May I speak to Mrs Pettus, please?” I honestly say that there is no such person here, as my wife has never used my last name, but I helpfully inform the caller that he has reached Mr Pettus. Silence. Long, awkward silence. “May I help you?” I finally prompt. “No, you can’t,” he replies. More silence.

That was too creepy. I hung up. I’m still not sure what that was all about.

Porn Critiques Can Kill

Note to general populace: Please leave the critiques of pornography to the professionals. Thanks.

They are not amused, but we are.

Do visit this site before Her Majesty’s Government figures out a way of taking it down.

Life Imitates Satire

First, read this, then this.

(As often the case, via Boing Boing.)

Command-Line Food

Way back when we had to bang rocks together to do computation, and I was first learning to do so, one of the programs that the nerds at the Santa Monica High School Computer Lab put together was the “Store Program.” The only place to get snacks that was in walking distance of Samohi way back then was a rather scary liquor store on Pico just, uh, I guess that’s north-east of Lincoln.

Amazingly enough, that liquor store is still there.

The Store Program was pretty cool, in its primitive little Interdata 7/16 BASIC kind of way. It would take everyone’s order (red licorice and Coke for me, thanks!), calculate how much everyone owed (including tax), figure out from how much each person was putting in how much of what kind of change to get (down to the dime, nickel and penny), and (most important!) pick someone at random to walk to the store.

It is good to know that we still have geeks out there who are continuing the fine tradition of the Store Program, and the Xerox PARC burrito utility.

Scientology, Scientology, Scientology.

This is a wonderful story about Scientology, and one man’s infiltration of Celebrity Center (which those in the know call “CC” . . . he’s not making up the part about L. Ron’s roped-off office. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. It’s as creepy as hell). Boing Boing already ran it, but I’m linking to it as well, in a low-rent Googlehack to see if this story can become #1 for searches on “Scientology.”

Scientology.

Swanning Along

Dancing swan, Hyde Park, London, 2001

Speaking of animal rescue organizations, I also must mention the Swan Sanctuary in Surrey, England, another wonderful organization doing good work for feathered friends. And another another organization that was having trouble with small-minded bureaucrats.

If you visit, say hi to Franklin for us.

The Religious Policeman

On the web, like everywhere else, things that are too good to be true usually are. That being said, The Religious Policeman, a blog that is (supposedly) written by a Saudi about life in, as he puts it, "the Magic Kingdom," is hilarious.

Such a blog has an internal contradiction: If Saudi Arabia is such a closed, repressive society, how he is managing to get away with it? I can’t quite decide if it has the ring of truth or not, but it’s entertaining regardless.

(It’s amazing that we consider such a country a close ally. Of course, the geopolitics behind this are very complex, no doubt.)

The Fifth Sentence

“But the most compelling evidence is that he spent most if not all of this period abroad, either funded by these same means or, what is more likely, working, as his step-uncle, Thomas Alured, had done, as tutor and companion to a young man of means.”

— Nicholas Murray, World Enough and Time:
The Life of Andrew Marvell

Instructions: Grab the nearest book, open it to page 23, find the 5th sentence, and post its text along with these instructions. Point back to where you got the idea so that we can follow the threads. I got it from ongoing.

Give Your Friend an Ulcer

For a porn baron, I am unaccountably fond of stuffed animals. (No comments, please.) But not just any stuffed animals: they have to be interesting and unique. The stuffties from Giant Microbes definitely qualify. My personal favorites are Helicobacter pylori (ulcers, right) and Saccharomyces cerevisiae (beer and bread yeast). One of the yeastie beasties presides serenely over the kitchen at my place.

I can hardly wait for the STDs to become available.

A page-turner

There are certain people who are both extremely proficient with Flash and have way too much time on their hands.